Re-Birth

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be."  Psalm 139:13-16

One week ago we celebrated what would have been Lynnea's second birthday.  Today is Lynnea's baptismal birthday.  Even though her baptism, like all baptisms, was a joyous moment, it is a difficult day for me to think about.  She was baptized in the ER while fighting for her life.  Those moments are not happy memories, and I try not to dwell on them, but I think that it is worth remembering once in a while.  She was baptized in Princeton while we waited for the neonatal team from the NICU at the U of M to come up to transport her.  We arrived at the U in the middle of the night; they ran tests all night, and finally, around 6am a cardiologist came to talk to us about Lynnea's echocardiogram.  I remember the cardiologist drawing a picture and describing what a normal heart looks like, and then drawing a picture of Lynnea's heart.  She described all of the things that were wrong with Lynnea's cardiac anatomy -- the list seemed to go on forever, and by the time she was finished, I wondered if there was anything left that was "right" about Lynnea's heart.  I also remember looking at that list, and looking at the drawings, and I couldn't help but marvel at God's amazing handiwork.  I was impressed that Lynnea was alive at all, and amazed at the way that her little body had managed to compensate for an entire week even though it appeared that there was more wrong with her heart than right.  God's design was perfect in the beginning, and even this completely flawed version of anatomy was capable of so much, I couldn't help but be in awe. When God created Lynnea, He knew all of the intricacies of her entire anatomy, and He knew exactly how many days she would live here on this earth, and what each of those days would entail.  He had a plan from her, and that night in the ER when we had her baptized, we placed her in the palm of His hand, and we trusted that whatever He had planned for her, it was for the best.  Today in church, we celebrated All Saint's Day (even though, technically, All Saint's Day was last Monday), recognizing all of the faithful believers that God had called home to heaven.  Lynnea is one of those believers.  Knowing this allows us to grieve her passing with hope -- the hope that we will one day see her again in heaven.  Through her baptism, the faith that was necessary for her to get to spend eternity in heaven was placed in her.  So, even though most of my memories from that night are some of the most unpleasant memories that I have, it is worth remembering and celebrating that moment when Lynnea Hope was baptized.